two elves came shooting down from space like shooting stars
if they are coming, we may find salvation in immortal teachings.
-Liam
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
minutes, not in order
drained left ring finger 4 ways 10 min. each thumb to outside of 2nd bone
held 2 earth touching mudras for 1,000 breaths each ring and middle fingers
meditated on suffering for 4o minutes,
found you can hold padma mudra on ground in front, behind, and on the sides, held in front for most of that time and imprinted in other directions
meditated on word suffering while holding padma mudras behind my back on ground 7:16-8:17
drained left thumb 10 min, 4 ways, to 2nd bone
drained left thumb, thumb to middle nail 2:59-3:34
DREAM we were being chased by a robot monster, something about competing for apple and microsoft stock. he chased us for $11, I held his ankle and he stopped.
4:06-6:09 middle and index fingers to temples together
drained right hand, middle ring index and thumb, 10 mins 4 ways each, outside of first knuckle.
dream: Jamyang and another teaching ecology and looking at water crystals, 3 billion watching
drained right index, thumb to 2nd joint 4 ways10 min each on outside
feeling of chi in fingers, also feeling like gunpowder escaping
drain crown-thumb to nail of index 5:20-5:51.
dream: travelling between stars, the leader is a girl who sticks to protocol, I keep breaking it worrying that I'm going to be abandoned. we're in a world full of snakes, something is lost. I have to negotiate with the snakes, one has bitten me.
left hand to right hip, right hand to left buttocks 9:28-11:28
drained left middle finger, 4 ways 10 min. each to 2nd bone on outside
dream-kuten lama teaching tai chi
drained left ring 10 min 4 ways each 2nd bone outside
drained left pinky 10 min 4 ways, 2nd bone on outside
dream-a corvette, guy from TV show brown hair getting hair cut. a skateboarder and I'm practicing tennis.
Dream: I'm an orca swimming with dolphins splashing my tail and then jumping. A mario video game, 8 bit but more complicated than mario 1, with mario 2 elements
drained left thumb, 4 ways 10 min each, thumb to 2nd bone on outside
dream-tennis friends showing mudras
touched all finger to every part of body I can reach for all fingers, all knuckles and joints on inside of both hands.
11:41-12:03, drained top of head tumb to tip of pinky-feelings of disgust with pride
touched first joint of pinky to all parts of body
drained left thumb and left index, 4 fingers to nail 1o min each
dream-huge crowd of people, blew Jason with wind from my hand, he had a scared look on his face, I tell him this is a dream, a lucid dream, a faucet, I can move the water with my mind
drain right big toe 10:42-11:09
drained right 2nd toe11:09-11:29
note shambhavi, nithya, tai chi throughout, not written down
dream: my parents and I are lost in the county and we find a house, go in, try to light a candle, they come out and I feel terrible, someone does a yoga asana and asks me about it, and then I'm freaked. they cook us fod and then I'm freaked and I ask Suzy what the fallen angel's name is and she says rubyochio.
-drained left pinky 4 ways 10 min each
thumb to first knuckle on outside
drained left ring 4 ways 10 min each thumb to first knuckle on outside
drained left middle finger 10 min to first knuckle 4 ways
drained crown, right hand thumb to tip of middle finger 10 mins
drained left index 10 min each, thumb to outside of first knuckle 4 ways 10 min each
held left pinky to right nipple 4:06-6:07
drained left thumb index through piny 10 min each
meditated on recognition and regret of lying and wrong views
5:50-6:50 feet together facing bed end corner
7:14-8:15 brahmacharya facing bed end corner, drained right piny 4 ways, 10 min each, tips of fingers, drained right ring finger and right middle fingers 4 ways 10 min each tip of each finger
drained left index 4 finger tips to thumb tips 10 minutes each
left thumb drained 10 minutes, 4 ways tips of fingers
problems-impatience, thoughts of no lasting beneft, distraction
drained right pinky and right ring fingers
thumb to nail 4 fingers 10 minutes each
drained crown thumb to tip of index 10-15 minutes
felt like a tiny grain of sand on a huge beach
drained right index and right thumb, 10 mins 4 ways each to nail
6:33-7:33 half wise man, right foot to perennium left hand, thumb and pinky to nose, other fingers to 3rd eye.
drained right pinky and right ring fingers 4 fingers nail to thumb 10 min. each.
drained left middle finger to nail 4 fingers 10 min each.
torch mudra, right thumb to left ring
11:30-12:30 had to meditate on wish for a cleaner earth, cleaner moooladhara to hold it
reading for 1st yoga assignment and dolphin pose
drained left middle finger tip of each finger to thumb, 10 mins. each.
brahmacharya facing side wall 1 hour, imprinted cosmic mudras and links sitting
when I leaned back I felt a great surg of blissful nectar energy in 2 nd chakra.
as ring spin straightened. It felt like orange nectar. I kept lowering energy trying to get it from the top of my crown and it felt like a different me as energy returned. I need to return to cosmic mudras in other directions because I missed some, namel individual links opposing and entangled. I need to drain finger and a new finger 10 minutes each deay each minger , 40 minutes a day, 12 per finger, or 6 if inside is too hard. works best when motivation is compassion for all, otherwise mudras break.
drained left ring and index tips of finger to thumbs 40 mins each.
full brahmacharya, facing bookshelf corner 1 hour, right hand in front of left on ground, great bliss at heart and visualized myself holding/mastering mudras and asanas
.....
not going to put everything, not enough time.
so I'm writing this out, maybe I can get worksheets together to track progress in time.
held 2 earth touching mudras for 1,000 breaths each ring and middle fingers
meditated on suffering for 4o minutes,
found you can hold padma mudra on ground in front, behind, and on the sides, held in front for most of that time and imprinted in other directions
meditated on word suffering while holding padma mudras behind my back on ground 7:16-8:17
drained left thumb 10 min, 4 ways, to 2nd bone
drained left thumb, thumb to middle nail 2:59-3:34
DREAM we were being chased by a robot monster, something about competing for apple and microsoft stock. he chased us for $11, I held his ankle and he stopped.
4:06-6:09 middle and index fingers to temples together
drained right hand, middle ring index and thumb, 10 mins 4 ways each, outside of first knuckle.
dream: Jamyang and another teaching ecology and looking at water crystals, 3 billion watching
drained right index, thumb to 2nd joint 4 ways10 min each on outside
feeling of chi in fingers, also feeling like gunpowder escaping
drain crown-thumb to nail of index 5:20-5:51.
dream: travelling between stars, the leader is a girl who sticks to protocol, I keep breaking it worrying that I'm going to be abandoned. we're in a world full of snakes, something is lost. I have to negotiate with the snakes, one has bitten me.
left hand to right hip, right hand to left buttocks 9:28-11:28
drained left middle finger, 4 ways 10 min. each to 2nd bone on outside
dream-kuten lama teaching tai chi
drained left ring 10 min 4 ways each 2nd bone outside
drained left pinky 10 min 4 ways, 2nd bone on outside
dream-a corvette, guy from TV show brown hair getting hair cut. a skateboarder and I'm practicing tennis.
Dream: I'm an orca swimming with dolphins splashing my tail and then jumping. A mario video game, 8 bit but more complicated than mario 1, with mario 2 elements
drained left thumb, 4 ways 10 min each, thumb to 2nd bone on outside
dream-tennis friends showing mudras
touched all finger to every part of body I can reach for all fingers, all knuckles and joints on inside of both hands.
11:41-12:03, drained top of head tumb to tip of pinky-feelings of disgust with pride
touched first joint of pinky to all parts of body
drained left thumb and left index, 4 fingers to nail 1o min each
dream-huge crowd of people, blew Jason with wind from my hand, he had a scared look on his face, I tell him this is a dream, a lucid dream, a faucet, I can move the water with my mind
drain right big toe 10:42-11:09
drained right 2nd toe11:09-11:29
note shambhavi, nithya, tai chi throughout, not written down
dream: my parents and I are lost in the county and we find a house, go in, try to light a candle, they come out and I feel terrible, someone does a yoga asana and asks me about it, and then I'm freaked. they cook us fod and then I'm freaked and I ask Suzy what the fallen angel's name is and she says rubyochio.
-drained left pinky 4 ways 10 min each
thumb to first knuckle on outside
drained left ring 4 ways 10 min each thumb to first knuckle on outside
drained left middle finger 10 min to first knuckle 4 ways
drained crown, right hand thumb to tip of middle finger 10 mins
drained left index 10 min each, thumb to outside of first knuckle 4 ways 10 min each
held left pinky to right nipple 4:06-6:07
drained left thumb index through piny 10 min each
meditated on recognition and regret of lying and wrong views
5:50-6:50 feet together facing bed end corner
7:14-8:15 brahmacharya facing bed end corner, drained right piny 4 ways, 10 min each, tips of fingers, drained right ring finger and right middle fingers 4 ways 10 min each tip of each finger
drained left index 4 finger tips to thumb tips 10 minutes each
left thumb drained 10 minutes, 4 ways tips of fingers
problems-impatience, thoughts of no lasting beneft, distraction
drained right pinky and right ring fingers
thumb to nail 4 fingers 10 minutes each
drained crown thumb to tip of index 10-15 minutes
felt like a tiny grain of sand on a huge beach
drained right index and right thumb, 10 mins 4 ways each to nail
6:33-7:33 half wise man, right foot to perennium left hand, thumb and pinky to nose, other fingers to 3rd eye.
drained right pinky and right ring fingers 4 fingers nail to thumb 10 min. each.
drained left middle finger to nail 4 fingers 10 min each.
torch mudra, right thumb to left ring
11:30-12:30 had to meditate on wish for a cleaner earth, cleaner moooladhara to hold it
reading for 1st yoga assignment and dolphin pose
drained left middle finger tip of each finger to thumb, 10 mins. each.
brahmacharya facing side wall 1 hour, imprinted cosmic mudras and links sitting
when I leaned back I felt a great surg of blissful nectar energy in 2 nd chakra.
as ring spin straightened. It felt like orange nectar. I kept lowering energy trying to get it from the top of my crown and it felt like a different me as energy returned. I need to return to cosmic mudras in other directions because I missed some, namel individual links opposing and entangled. I need to drain finger and a new finger 10 minutes each deay each minger , 40 minutes a day, 12 per finger, or 6 if inside is too hard. works best when motivation is compassion for all, otherwise mudras break.
drained left ring and index tips of finger to thumbs 40 mins each.
full brahmacharya, facing bookshelf corner 1 hour, right hand in front of left on ground, great bliss at heart and visualized myself holding/mastering mudras and asanas
.....
not going to put everything, not enough time.
so I'm writing this out, maybe I can get worksheets together to track progress in time.
Friday, October 16, 2009
news
I've been visualizing much more clearly...
buddhas holding mudras and asanas
I feel these moments of intense joy and bliss from practice and realized I need to transform the habit energies that keep me doing things that lead to painful or unjoyful states of being.
and then I'll keep the joy or bliss with me.
the heaviness in my head is largely linked with the world's heaviness, as depending on what I concentrate on it goes away and comes back when I see and look at the problems of the world and how it relates with my own karma/ic formations.
I fell for a swing dancer, Nora's army, St. Clare.
I'll have to figure out how to find her again.
my minutes will be published again, but I don't have them with me.
I'm looking forward to returning to tai chi and need to keep up the practices.
worried of losing my way, falling downhill...
wish I had pictures of the mudras, to show what I'm doing.
homage to the tai chi masters and yogis, who help me keep my way.
buddhas holding mudras and asanas
I feel these moments of intense joy and bliss from practice and realized I need to transform the habit energies that keep me doing things that lead to painful or unjoyful states of being.
and then I'll keep the joy or bliss with me.
the heaviness in my head is largely linked with the world's heaviness, as depending on what I concentrate on it goes away and comes back when I see and look at the problems of the world and how it relates with my own karma/ic formations.
I fell for a swing dancer, Nora's army, St. Clare.
I'll have to figure out how to find her again.
my minutes will be published again, but I don't have them with me.
I'm looking forward to returning to tai chi and need to keep up the practices.
worried of losing my way, falling downhill...
wish I had pictures of the mudras, to show what I'm doing.
homage to the tai chi masters and yogis, who help me keep my way.
Monday, October 5, 2009
minutes, from hospital
cosmic mudra right foot, hands entangled right hand forward 7:57-9:03
cosmic mudra right foot, hand entangled left forward 2:08-3:36
hold left pinky to third eye 1 hour
hold left ring to third eye 3:45-4:47
meditate on ignorance 4:53-5:49
generosity: wrong and right generosity.
such as generosity towards harmful spirits, offering weapons to harmful is bad
holding onto what you don't need but others need can be relatively harmful
hold left ankle index to index 7:17-9:38
right hand over left hand cosmic mudra right foot end 12:00 guess 1 houe
right hand over left hand cosmic mudra left foot end 2:17, guess 1 hour
left hand over right hand cosmic mudra right foot 4:21-5:58
left hand over right hand cosmic mudra left foot guess 1 hour
drain right mid toe, end 9:25
padma mudra facing board 4:25-5:59 under butt head on ground
leaning back hands on ground 2:05-3:29
left foot cosmic mudra hands entangled left hand forward 12:15-1:16
held neck and confessed 7:25-9:43
shat kriya posture, hands up facing door 2:35-2:45
3 minute headstand on pillow against wall
drain top of head right hand1:57-2:18, thumb to index and middle first knuckle
padma mudra facing corner 12:30-12:50
half celibacy 12:55-1:55
hold base of spine, end 5:56
drain left hand 10:10-11:05
celibacy
3:08-4:42
drain right hand 10:07-11:05
thumb to index and middle
cosmic mudra right foot, hand entangled left forward 2:08-3:36
hold left pinky to third eye 1 hour
hold left ring to third eye 3:45-4:47
meditate on ignorance 4:53-5:49
generosity: wrong and right generosity.
such as generosity towards harmful spirits, offering weapons to harmful is bad
holding onto what you don't need but others need can be relatively harmful
hold left ankle index to index 7:17-9:38
right hand over left hand cosmic mudra right foot end 12:00 guess 1 houe
right hand over left hand cosmic mudra left foot end 2:17, guess 1 hour
left hand over right hand cosmic mudra right foot 4:21-5:58
left hand over right hand cosmic mudra left foot guess 1 hour
drain right mid toe, end 9:25
padma mudra facing board 4:25-5:59 under butt head on ground
leaning back hands on ground 2:05-3:29
left foot cosmic mudra hands entangled left hand forward 12:15-1:16
held neck and confessed 7:25-9:43
shat kriya posture, hands up facing door 2:35-2:45
3 minute headstand on pillow against wall
drain top of head right hand1:57-2:18, thumb to index and middle first knuckle
padma mudra facing corner 12:30-12:50
half celibacy 12:55-1:55
hold base of spine, end 5:56
drain left hand 10:10-11:05
celibacy
3:08-4:42
drain right hand 10:07-11:05
thumb to index and middle
Thursday, September 24, 2009
more
5 or six locks, to lock in progress in 5 or six skandhas, left over right and right over left
at each center/chakra, front, backwards, left, right 24 hours.
also... imprint positions of sahaja bandhan and kundalini raising hand positions for 24 hours.
holding head in different ways, top, and behind head 4 ways, up to 24 hours.
hold temples with pinkys, each set of 5 fingers.
read! study! let my mind flow free!
Liam
at each center/chakra, front, backwards, left, right 24 hours.
also... imprint positions of sahaja bandhan and kundalini raising hand positions for 24 hours.
holding head in different ways, top, and behind head 4 ways, up to 24 hours.
hold temples with pinkys, each set of 5 fingers.
read! study! let my mind flow free!
Liam
Monday, September 14, 2009
I spent 12 days maybe in the hospital.
I was able to get a lot of practice in since hospitals are clean.
I cried like a baby when they were giving me a shot.
the meds ain't good though.
whatever merit or energy I gained though, the meds sucked out of me.
AAAHHHH!!!!!
an amazing meditation on lightning, dream, cloud
like from diamond sutra, holding mudras, cute nurses.
thought I'd have something more poetic to say, something more eloquent.
many good things, it's so hard to keep the energy inside myself. I'm attached to bliss,
but can't maintain it.
lam
I was able to get a lot of practice in since hospitals are clean.
I cried like a baby when they were giving me a shot.
the meds ain't good though.
whatever merit or energy I gained though, the meds sucked out of me.
AAAHHHH!!!!!
an amazing meditation on lightning, dream, cloud
like from diamond sutra, holding mudras, cute nurses.
thought I'd have something more poetic to say, something more eloquent.
many good things, it's so hard to keep the energy inside myself. I'm attached to bliss,
but can't maintain it.
lam
Saturday, September 12, 2009
seeing the void, the great fear of emptiness
If I try... to meditate on "emptiness"
I find it unhelpful, I tend to neglect my instincts and what lies before me. I tend to go so far as to find that the word emptiness implies nihilism.
That a more helpful word, that doesn't contradict karmic causality, and causes and conditions in general, that doesn't ignore intuition and reason...
would be impermanence. impermanence of phenomena. impermanence of feelings. impermanence of relationships. I wager, metaphorically,
that what is so painful to people when they here the word emptiness has nothing to do with it being a difficult philosphical assertion, but that induces in the mind a nihilistic bias that can influence us to negate our responsibilities.
I find it unhelpful, I tend to neglect my instincts and what lies before me. I tend to go so far as to find that the word emptiness implies nihilism.
That a more helpful word, that doesn't contradict karmic causality, and causes and conditions in general, that doesn't ignore intuition and reason...
would be impermanence. impermanence of phenomena. impermanence of feelings. impermanence of relationships. I wager, metaphorically,
that what is so painful to people when they here the word emptiness has nothing to do with it being a difficult philosphical assertion, but that induces in the mind a nihilistic bias that can influence us to negate our responsibilities.
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